I’m still alive, though cutting my wrist has crossed my mind not less than 8 times as of last night.
This is my third update for today, I think. Oh. No. It's already 1:36 in the morning. So this doesn't count as the third update. This is the first update for today-- assuming that I will post another update later, after school.
I haven't sleep yet. Maybe I'm really used to staying up late while talking to him over the phone. Now, I'm still up even when I'm alone. I miss him.
He texted me and he said that he's at a KTV place. I don't know. I hope he did not drink beer. I don't want to think that he's purposely hurting me.
I just finished reviewing 8 pages of my Filipino book because I was assigned as the facilitator of our class later. I think I should volunteer or maybe get a lot of school works to keep myself busy and distracted.
I still cry. There are times when I purposely stop whatever I am doing, no matter how important just to give myself time to cry.
You see, he's not just any other guy. He's the love of my life. He deserves every teardrop from my eyes.
He needs time away from me. He took my ability to smile and my ability to sleep since the day he left.
I feel empty.
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